Classic Friday : Twister (1996) 8/10

Starring : Helen Hunt, Bill Paxton, Cary Elwes, Jami Gertz, Philip Seymour Hoffman
Director : Jan de Bont
Running Time : 96 mins

Tornado chaser Jo Harding (Hunt) and her weatherman husband Bill (Paxton) are in the middle of a complicated separation, with Bill wanting a quick divorce so he can get married to his girlfriend Melissa (Gertz), but when a series of terrible storms start winding their way across Oklahoma they all find themselves involved in trying to keep up with the tornado and intercept it so they can attempt to create an improved tornado warning system.

Surprisingly this is one of the fsvourite movies of my girlfriend. She loves disaster movies! It may sound odd, but this is actually a fun movie, which doesn't so much focus on the destruction of the storm but more on the relationships of the brave / stupid people trying to keep up with it. Well worth watching if you're a disaster movie buff.

You’ll like this if you liked : The Day After Tomorrow

South Of Pico (2007) 8/10

Starring : Kip Pardue, Henry Simmons, Gina Torres, Soren Fulton
Director : Ernst Gossner
Running Time : 86 mins

A chauffeur (Pardue), a doctor (Simmons), a waitress (Torres) and a young boy (Fulton) find their lives brought together when they witness the death of a young girl at the hands of a drunk driver. Their reactions to the accident, combined with the events of their day, cause them to respond in a distinctly violent minded manner.

This was actually an interesting movie, although the over the top violence at the close of the movie seemed a little too surreal. I liked the build up of frustration and anger in the three characters, and the obvious instant anger of the mother of the murdered child, and anyone who likes violent dramas will love this.

You’ll like this if you liked : Crash

Win A Date With Tad Hamilton! (2004) 7/10

Starring : Kate Bosworth, Topher Grace, Josh Duhamel, Nathan Lane, Sean Hayes, Gary Cole, Ginnifer Goodwin
Director : Robert Luketic
Running Time : 94 mins

When Rosalee Futch (Bosworth), a small town girl with simple dreams, wins a date with movie hunk Tad Hamilton (Duhamel), she's surprised when the date goes better than she ever could have expected and Tad moves to her home town to be closer to her, which is terrible news for her best friend Pete (Grace) who is secretly in love with her.

I wasn’t expecting much from this, except possibly a reprise of Topher Grace’s role in That 70s Show and some ham acting from Kate Bosworth. Basically I wasn’t disappointed. The plot is simple enough, but the characterisation is too unbelievable, with Bosworth turning down Duhamel for Grace even though she’s never fancied him before. Chick flick fans might like this, but otherwise steer clear.

You’ll like this if you liked : Get Over It

Where The Wild Things Are (2009) 7/10

Starring : Max Records, Catherine Keener, James Gandolfini, Paul Dano, Catherine O'Hara, Forest Whitaker, Chris Cooper
Director : Spike Jonze
Running Time : 99 mins

Twelve year old Max (Records) runs away from home after a falling out with his mum and his sister and finds a small boat which he climbs into and sets sail to a mysterious island inhabited by wild monsters. They soon make him their king and he discovers their world filled with monstrous fun and adventure, as well as darker moments of true horror.

This was a strange movie that easily met with my expectations, having read the book as a child. I loved the cat pyjamas and the monsters themselves were great to watch and I thought it was great that they weren’t given exaggerated monster voices. Kids and adults alike will find something to like about this movie, although it does drag on for quite a while.

You’ll like this if you liked : Bridge To Terabithia

An American Haunting (2005) 6/10

Starring : Donald Sutherland, Sissy Spacek, James D'Arcy, Rachel Hurd-Wood
Director : Courtney Solomon
Running Time : 91 mins

In 1817, land owner John Bell (Sutherland) is cursed by one of his enemies and soon after an evil spirit takes over his home, threatening John and his family, and focussing it's attention on his daughter Betsy (Hurd-Wood), attacking the girl in the middle of the night. Desperate to stop the evil spirit from ruining their lives, John seeks help from his local community in ridding himself of the ghost.

This was okay, but its main problem was that it took a long time to get going. By having the setting introduced from the present day, the overall effect is diminished. It would have been far better to just have the story in the past with no flash forwarding at the beginning and end. Worth watching, but a little slow in places.

You’ll like this if you liked : A Haunting In Connecticut

College (2008) 5/10

Starring : Drake Bell, Andrew Caldwell, Kevin Covais
Director : Deb Hagen
Running Time : 91 mins

When Kevin Brewer (Bell) is dumped by his girlfriend on the verge of graduation, he decides he doesn't want to go to college orientation, but his best friends Carter (Caldwell) and Morris (Covais) convince him to go to take his mind off things, but when they get there they are faced with a group of juvenile Frat brothers who set about stealing all their money and making their weekend a living hell.

Why do I keep doing this to myself? Every teen college movie ever made in the last ten years has been pretty much appalling, but still I sit down every time and watch them. The jokes here are thin on the ground, the characters are terrible caricatures that work less than half the time, and the acting leaves much to be desired. Avoid this unless you really enjoy movies in which nothing happens.

You’ll like this if you liked : Pigs

Classic Friday : Star Trek V The Final Frontier (1989) 6/10

Starring : William Shatner, Leonard Nimoy, DeForest Kelley, James Doohan, Walter Koenig, George Takei, Nichelle Nichols, Laurence Luckinbill
Director : William Shatner
Running Time : 102 mins

When Spock’s (Nimoy) half brother Sybok (Luckinbill) takes a number of intergalactic ambassadors hostage, Captain James T Kirk (Shatner) the Enterprise crew are forced to travel to the remote planet Nimbus III to try and talk some sense into him, but soon find themselves dragged on a journey to the centre of the universe in search of a supreme being that Sybok believes to be God.

This is arguably the worst of the Star Trek series of movies, and most of the blame can be firmly placed on William Shatner who both got to write, direct and star in this terrible installment. In it's own right, this is a classic as it could have spelled the end of the franchise entirely, but thankfully TNG was still popular and Star Trek 6 was just around the corner to bring to an end the journey of the original Star Trek cast.

You’ll like this if you liked : Star Trek Nemesis

All About Steve (2009) 8/10

Starring : Sandra Bullock, Thomas Haden Church, Bradley Cooper
Director : Phil Traill
Running Time : 99 mins

After a blind date with a CNN cameraman called Steve (Cooper), crossword puzzle compiler Mary Horowitz (Bullock) becomes obsessed with the idea that they are destined to be together. After being fired for compiling a crossword entirely devoted to Steve, Mary goes on a cross country journey to find Steve and declare her love for him.

I actually thought this was quite funny, considering the slender plot line. Bullock manages to play crazy to great effect, and Cooper's reaction to her cooky nature is interesting to watch. The supporting cast were intriguing though not exactly beguiling, but I did like the fact that his didn't have the usual Hollywood ending that we've all come to expect and despise.

You’ll like this if you liked : Miss Congeniality

Zombie Strippers! (2008) 6/10

Starring : Jenna Jameson, Robert Englund, Roxy Saint, Penny Drake
Director : Jay Lee
Running Time : 91 mins

In an alternate future where the war on terror has gone just too far, the United States government have come up with a plan to prevent soldier casualties be creating a formula that can resurrect dead tissue, but when the inevitable happens and one of the infected escapes and winds up at an illegal strip joint, the patrons find themselves under attack by rampaging zombie strippers!

This is such a bad movie it is actually pretty entertaining. At times it feels like it started out as a porn film, but then became so over the top and mindlessly violent that the producers probably couldn't think of anyone who would wank to it Tha acting is hammy, though I'm guessing knowingly so, and fans of zombie movies will enjoy the nods to the genre and the overall fun poking nature of the film.

You’ll like this if you liked : 2001 Maniacs

Slap Her... She’s French (2002) 7/10

Starring : Piper Perabo, Jane McGregor, Trent Ford, Julie White
Director : Melani Mayron
Running Time : 88 mins

In order to win a beauty pageant, head cheerleader Starla Grady (McGregor) introduces a foreign exchange programme to her high school. Taking on board the first student, Genevieve Le Plouff (Perabo), Starla starts to suspect that she is slowly being usurped by the French girl who seems to be trying to steal her life out from under her.

In spite of having a ridiculously stupid title, this wasn't that bad of a teen comedy. McGregor is surprisingly good at times, especially in the scene where she accidentally drinks a load of liquid magic mushrooms, and Perabo's French accent is passable. Overall this is watchable, but possibly not more than once, despite being marginally entertaining.

You’ll like this if you liked : Bring It On

Little Man (2006) 5/10

Starring : Marlon Wayans, Shawn Wayans, Kerry Washington, John Witherspoon, Tracy Morgan
Director : Keenen Ivory Wayans
Running Time : 95 mins

Darryl (Wayans) wants nothing more than to be a father, but his other half Vanessa (Washington) thinks that work is more important, but when dwarf jewel thief Calvin (Wayans) hides a stolen diamond in Vanessa's handbag he is forced to disguise himself as a baby to infiltrate their home and steal back his loot.

Sweet Jesus this was not a good movie. Not only were the Wayans brothers arrogant enough to cast one of themselves as the dwarf instead of hiring an actual little person, but they then inundate us with jokes about how big their penises are. Granted, this was better than Scary Movie 2 or White Chicks, mainly thanks to the likes of Tracy Morgan and Molly Shannon, but it still suffered from focusing more on the Wayans than the flimsy plot.

You’ll like this if you liked : White Chicks

Sherlock Holmes (2009) 7/10

Starring : Robert Downey Jr, Jude Law, Rachel McAdams, Mark Strong, Eddie Marsan
Director : Guy Ritchie
Running Time : 129 mins

Following the capture of the evil Lord Blackwood (Strong), Sherlock Holmes (Downey) and his trusty sidekick Dr John Watson (Law) discover that Blackwood has died and risen from the grave in order to carry on his murderous rampage. As they continue their investigation, Holmes and Watson discover that Blackwood wasn't alone in his schemes and that there may be an entire group of people planning to wipe out the House Of Lords.

This was a little long winded for my liking, but it did have some entertaining moments and, as usual, Downey was perfect in the role. A lot of people seemed upset by his portrayal as Holmes, but this is possibly the most loyal to the books Hollywood has ever been. If you can sit through the whole movie you might be pleasantly surprised at how things turn out.

You’ll like this if you liked : Shanghai Knights

Classic Friday : The Family Jewels (1965) 7/10

Starring : Jerry Lewis, Donna Butterworth
Director : Jerry Lewis
Running Time : 96 mins

A young girl named Donna Peyton (Butterworth) finds herself the heiress to her family fortune when her father dies, leaving her $30 million, but she has to choose one of her remaining uncles to take care of her. Despite their best intentions, none of the uncles seem to be able to live up to the reputation of Willard (Lewis), her family bodyguard that has practically raised her since birth.

This isn’t one of Jerry Lewis’s best movies, and is a little over sentimental in parts, but it’s a great vehicle for Lewis to play lots of over the top silly characters, as well as revisit his Nutty Professor characters that proved so popular a few years earlier. Even children in this day and age might appreciate it’s similarities to Lemony Snickett’s series of short novels, and will no doubt love the various guises Lewis puts on throughout the film.

You’ll like this if you liked : Lemony Snicket's A Series Of Unfortunate Events

Bruno (2009) 6/10

Starring : Sacha Baron Cohen, Gustaf Hammarsten
Director : Larry Charles
Running Time : 78 mins

Overly flamboyant Austrain wannabe fashion guru Bruno (Cohen) travels to the USA to try to make a name for himself, but ends up resorting to desperate tactics to make himself a celebrity including sex videos, adoption, and eventually tries to make himself straight like all of his favourite actors, including Tom Cruise and Kevin Spacey.

This is such a gross out movie that I can't think of anyone who wouldn't turn away from the screen at least once. If you thought Borat's mankini was too close to the bone, wait until you see some of the devices and outfits that he pulls out of the closet in this. To be blunt, this isn't intelligent humour, and some of it isn't even that funny, but it's sheer disgustingness will raise at least one laugh out of anyone with a sense of humour.

You’ll like this if you liked : Borat

Pigs (2007) 6/10

Starring : Jefferson Brown, Darryn Lucio, Christopher Elliott, Melanie Marden, Kelly Cunningham
Director : Karl DiPelino
Running Time : 85 mins

Encouraged by his juvenile friends, college stud Miles (Brown) decides to attempt to sleep a minimum of twenty-six girls before the end of the semester – each with a surname starting with a different letter of the alphabet – but when he finds the elusive X, Gabrielle (Marden), he finds himself for the first time ever falling in love.

This was one of those movies which, if it had have been treated right, could have been quite entertaining. Unfortunately the cast, crew, writer and director all have no clue on how to create characters. Everyone is a stereotype with no depth to them, and they all have very strange motivations for their actions, whether it be seeming peer pressure or just plain bad writing. There is a twist in the tale, but it is delivered with such a lack of impact they might as well have gone with the obvious conclusion instead.

You’ll like this if you liked : Cougar Club

Requiem For A Dream (2000) 9/10

Starring : Ellen Burstyn, Jared Leto, Jennifer Connelly, Marlon Wayans
Director : Darren Aronofsky
Running Time : 100 mins

When she discovers she is going to make an appearance on her favourite game show, Sara Goldfarb (Burstyn) is prescribed diet pills by her doctor which she slowly becomes addicted to. Meanwhile her junkie son Harry (Leto) and his drug dealer friends Tyrone (Wayans) decide to buy heroin in bulk in order to make more money but end up, along with Harry's girlfriend Marion, further addicted to the drug. The results of this individual addictions all have very different but equally disastrous results.

I was pleasantly surprised by this strange little quirky movie, which I watched at two in the morning. The direction is brilliant and the acting, particularly by Ellen Burstyn, was exceptional (even Marlon Wayans was passable, seeing as he had no involvement in the script). I especially liked that what could have been another ordinary movie about drug addiction is interspersed with scenes of Burstyn, the most innocent of the drug addicts in the movie. Well worth watching!

You’ll like this if you liked : Candy

The Passion Of The Christ (2004) 7/10

Starring : James Caviezel, Maia Morgenstern, Christo Jivkov, Francesco De Vito, Monica Bellucci
Director : Mel Gibson
Running Time : 119 mins

Jesus (Caviezel) is arrested for blasphemy by the Romans due to his apparent claims of performing miracles with his magical powers, and is sentenced to the most painful and horrible death imaginable.

This movie was okay, if a little graphic, but quite what Mel Gibson was thinking when he directed this we’ll probably never know. In spite of being a devout Catholic, he decides to create the kind of movie that the Church has been fighting against for years, with its scenes of brutal violence from the very start of the film. Fair enough, it’s most likely the most realistic portrayal of the crucifixion that we’re going to see, but steer clear if you are overly sensitive or have a weak stomach.

You’ll like this if you liked : Apocalypto

Law Abiding Citizen (2009) 8/10

Starring : Jamie Foxx, Gerard Butler, Colm Meaney, Bruce McGill, Leslie Bibb
Director : F Gary Gray
Running Time : 104 mins

Vengeance filled victim Clyde Shelton (Butler) decides to take justice into his own hands when the killer of his daughter is set free, but he not only seeks revenge against the killer but also against district attorney Nick Rice (Foxx) and everyone else involved in the case. The police capture him as soon as he kills his daughters killer, but somehow Shelton manages to keep up his vengeful rampage.

This was such an over the top action flick, Steven Seagal could have easily starred in the lead role. However, Butler takes the helm with Foxx stealing much of the limelight as he watches his friends dying all around him. The plot is far fetched, and a lot of loopholes remain unanswered at the close of action, but if you just switch off and relax this is a pretty entertaining action thriller.

You’ll like this if you liked : Taken

Classic Friday : Whisper Of The Heart (1995) 9/10

Starring : Brittany Snow, David Gallagher, Cary Elwes, Ashley Tisdale
Director : Yoshifumi Kondo
Running Time : 115 mins

After deciding to spend her summer doing nothing but reading, a young girl named Shizuku (Snow) discovers to her curiosity that every book she borrows out from her library has been borrowed previously by the same person, a boy named Seiji Amasawa (Gallagher). She soon meets Seiji when she is lead to a violin shop by a mysterious cat called The Baron (Elwes), and a lifelong friendship begins.

I absolutely love this movie. It isn’t patronizing, and it has a simple premise that works beautifully. The characters are likable and memorable, and the inclusion of The Baron to amuse the very young is done with such skill that it only acts to improve the narrative. This is possibly Studio Ghibli at their best when it comes to writing, and although not as visually pleasing as some of their offerings this is still a fantastic film.

You’ll like this if you liked : The Girl Who Leapt Through Time

(500) Days Of Summer (2009) 9/10

Starring : Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Zooey Deschanel, Geoffrey Arend, Chloe Moretz, Matthew Gray Gubler
Director : Marc Webb
Running Time : 95 mins

Tom Hansen (Gordon-Levitt) has spent is whole life living in a fantasy world where he’ll one day meet his ideal woman, so when he meets Summer Finn (Deschanel) he thinks that day has finally arrived. Unfortunately Summer is only interested in a casual relationship and doesn’t want to commit to anything, leaving Tom to ponder over the 500 days since they met.

This movie has such a great soundtrack – it’s like they took all my favourite songs and put them in one movie! The story is bittersweet and heartfelt, and the conclusion of Tom and Summer’s relationship is foregone to say the least, but at least it ends on a high note and leaves the watcher feeling either uplifted, or simply worried that Tom will have to go through it all over again.

You’ll like this if you liked : Away We Go

Piglet’s Big Movie (2003) 6/10

Starring : John Fiedler, Jim Cummings, Kath Soucie
Director : Francis Glebas
Running Time : 72 mins

After his friends tell him that he’s too small to help them in any of their honey-finding plans, Piglet (Fiedler) goes missing! With nothing but Piglet’s Book of Memories as an aid to their search, Winnie The Pooh (Cummings) and his chums go on an adventure through the Hundred Acre Woods, using the book as a guide and discovering along the way that Piglet has actually been detrimental to many of their greatest adventures.

This was pretty similar to most of the other Winnie The Pooh movies, and they’ve been coming thick and fast over the last few years. It was nice to have the focus on someone other than Pooh or Tigger, but even when focusing on Piglet the focus slipped back to other characters. Fans of A A Milne will enjoy reliving some of the classic children’s stories, and the characters are still as loveable as ever.

You’ll like this if you liked : The Tigger Movie

The Princess Diaries (2001) 8/10

Starring : Julie Andrews, Anne Hathaway, Hector Elizondo, Heather Matarazzo
Director : Garry Marshall
Running Time : 110 mins

Mia Thermopolis (Hathaway) is a total nerd who is teased at school by her peers and has been raised by her single mother from an early age, never having known her father. But when she discovers from her long lost grandmother, Queen Clarisse Renaldi (Andrews), that she is the crown princess of the small country of Genovia, she must choose between her anonymous life in San Francisco or the life of a royal.

I actually thought this wasn’t too bad – it wasn’t patronising anyway, like a lot of teen movies can be. Hathaway and Andrews make a likable screen pair, and Elizondo is a predictable yet likable romantic interest for the Queen, whilst Princess Mia has an obvious romance of her own. Kids and grown-ups alike will enjoy this, so don’t be put off by the Disney production name.

You’ll like this if you liked : Ella Enchanted

Death Defying Acts (2007) 5/10

Starring : Guy Pearce, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Timothy Spall, Saoirse Ronan
Director : Gillian Armstrong
Running Time : 90 mins

Psychic con artist Mary McGarvie (Zeta-Jones) and her daughter Benji (Ronan) meet Harry Houdini (Pearce), the infamous escapologist, on a tour of Scotland, and take the opportunity to try and make a lot of money, but things don’t go according to plan when Mary falls for the famed illusionist.

I was a little disappointed by this movie – I thought it needed a lot more heart and characterization than is contained. The acting was subpar and the plot, though based on apparently true events, could have been bulked out a little. Houdini’s inevitable death seemed very subdued, and a few more actual death defying acts wouldn’t have gone amiss.

You’ll like this if you liked : Finding Neverland

Dorian Gray (2009) 7/10

Starring : Ben Barnes, Colin Firth, Rachel Hurd-Wood, Rebecca Hall, Emilia Fox, Ben Chaplin
Director : Oliver Parker
Running Time : 108 mins

After commissioning a portrait of himself to be produced, wealthy toff Dorian Gray (Barnes) discovers that the painting is reflecting all of his injuries, whereas he remains unscathed. As the years pass, the painting slowly starts to show signs of ageing whilst Dorian remains perpetually youthful, in spite of his hedonistic lifestyle.

This wasn’t bad, but I much preferred the Hurd Hatfield version from 1945, mainly because I remember seeing it as a kid an being terrified of the painting. This version shows the painting far too soon, but it was far more loyal to Oscar Wilde’s novel with its camp motifs and creepy sexual antics. Worth watching, but a little bit of a let down for fans.

You’ll like this if you liked : Perfume : The Story Of A Murderer

Classic Friday : Black Christmas (1974) 8/10

Starring : Olivia Hussey, Keir Dullea, Margot Kidder, Andrea Martin, John Saxon
Director : Bob Clark
Running Time : 97 mins

A sorority house finds itself receiving a large number of prank calls, getting to such a point that the girls get the police involved. However, when one of the girls is found dead in the area, the police realise that the prank calls might not be all in fun as they first imagined, and that a serial killer is on the loose...

This is the slasher movie which clearly inspired such popular horror series as Friday The 13th, Halloween and A Nightmare On Elm Street. It has all the set pieces you'd expect of a slasher film; there's young girls getting killed, there's a killer in the house, and the survivor is a girl, but the pacing is a little too slow by today’s standards. However, the acting is strong and consistent, with some credible leads in the form of Olivia Hussey and Margot Kidder, with John Saxon appearing as the policeman investigating prank calls.

You’ll like this if you liked : Halloween

I Love You, Beth Cooper (2009) 8/10

Starring : Hayden Panettiere, Paul Rust, Jack T Carpenter, Lauren London, Lauren Storm
Director : Chris Colombus
Running Time : 98 mins

Denis Cooverman (Rust), perpetual nerd, decides to make a speech at his High School graduation, declaring his love for Beth Cooper (Panettiere). After feeling humiliated, he and his best friend Rich (Carpenter) are shocked to find that Beth and her two friends Cammy (London) and Treece (Storm) standing on his doorstep, having actually turned up for his valedictorian graduation party. But with Beth’s boyfriend on the warpath, Denis’s night soon turns into a disastrous adventure he’ll never forget.

This movie harks back to the olden days of teen movies, with Chris Colombus at the helm and even Alan Ruck of Ferris Bueller fame putting in an appearance as Denis’s dad. It’s a little more risqué than some more recent high school comedies, with brief nudity and threesomes amongst the plotline, and the teen actors actually look like they could be teenagers for a change. Worth checking out if you enjoyed American Pie.

You’ll like this if you liked : Licence To Drive