Scary Movie 5 (2013) 5/10

Starring : Ashley Tisdale, Simon Rex, Gracie Whitton, Ava Kolker
Director : Malcolm D Lee
Running Time : 86 mins

Ballerina Jody Sanders (Tisdale) and her monkey scientist husband Dan (Rex) find themselves taking three children into their care when the father of the kids dies. They soon experience strange activity around the house and lead the problems back to the invisible friend of the children and a mysterious cabin in the woods.

Well, at least this primarily parodies horror movies – namely Mama and Paranormal Activity – even though it does throw in elements of Rise of The Planet Of The Apes and Black Swan for good measure. Fans of the originals will generally enjoy this latest instalment, and thank god it isn’t like those other movie movies that have been doing the rounds for the last decade or so. The problem is there aren’t enough horror references and too many references to other genres to make this a good scary movie, and the fact that there have been so many horror films in recent years to supply the makers with fodder makes this feel even weaker.

You’ll like this if you liked : A Haunted House

Dream House (2011) 8/10

Starring : Daniel Craig, Naomi Watts, Rachel Weisz, Elias Koteas, Marton Csokas
Director : Jim Sheridan
Running Time : 91 mins

Will Atenton (Craig) moves into a new home with his wife Libby (Weisz) and their two daughters only to discover that their home was the scene of a grisly murder many years previously. As Will complains that his family were never informed of this before they bought the place, he discovers some startling details about the murder that make him question his own sanity.

This is a pretty entertaining movie that – although at first glance it appears to be a horror – is in fact more of a remotely supernatural thriller, focussing more on drama and crime than on ghosts and ghouls. Halfway through we discover that what we have so far been lead to believe is all lies, and the supernatural element kicks in but soon becomes benign and the action focuses more on a murderer who Will has to find to clear his name. A fun though down-beat dramatic thriller that is sure to keep you guessing.

You’ll like this if you liked : The Others

Pompeii (2014) 5/10

Starring : Kit Harington, Emily Browning, Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, Jessica Lucas, Carrie-Anne Moss, Jared Harris, Kiefer Sutherland
Director : Paul W S Anderson
Running Time : 105 mins

A slave named Milo (Harington) is forced into fighting as a gladiator in 1st Century Pompeii. His only dream is to save the life of Cassia (Browning), the woman he has grown to love, who has been promised to Roman Senator Corvus (Sutherland) who wishes to marry her. But as he fights for her, Mount Vesuvius begins to erupt, threatening everyone who lives in its shadow.

I don’t know what the makers of this movie were trying to achieve by throwing a love story into an actual historical event, but the end result is incredibly ill conceived. Like Titanic, we know the relationship is probably doomed from the get go, but at least there was hope in Titanic. In this I just didn’t care what happened to the incredibly wooden characters, and when the inevitable happened (more than half way through the movie) it came as something of a relief. The fight scenes are okay, but they were just too few and far between, and the action sequences for the volcano (and for some reason tsunami) were ridiculously inaccurate.

You’ll like this if you liked : Gladiator

The Tall Man (2012) 7/10

Starring : Jessica Biel, Jodelle Ferland, Stephen McHattie, William B Davis, Samantha Ferris
Director : Pascal Laugier
Running Time : 106 mins

Julia Denning (Biel) is a nurse who lives in the sleepy town of Cold Rock. When her son is kidnapped in the middle of the night, suspicion falls on the local legend of The Tall Man, a mystical figure that kidnaps children and buries them in the old mining tunnels that run under the town, but the truth behind the legend is soon revealed, and Julia becomes the prime suspect in a string of child abductions.

This is like Changeling without the passion in the performances, and with a silly internet meme as the apparent villain but don’t be fooled – this is not a horror film. Halfway through there’s a huge twist, which removes this from horror territory and switches it a standard crime drama stroke thriller. This does suffer from being confusing at times due to the major plot twists, and perhaps this is too clever for its own good, but in hindsight it is a reasonably well made movie that keeps you guessing right up to the end.

You’ll like this if you liked : Changeling

Snitch (2013) 6/10

Starring : Dwayne Johnson, Barry Pepper, Jon Bernthal, Susan Sarandon, Michael K Williams, Rafi Gavron
Director : Ric Roman Waugh
Running Time : 108 mins

When construction worker John Matthews (Johnson) discovers that his son Jason (Gavron) has been falsely arrested for drug trafficking, he makes a shady deal with the DEA to allow him to go undercover to catch some big time drug dealers in return for his sons freedom.

What can I say? Ordinarily, you can’t go wrong with a movie lead by Dwayne The Rock Johnson, but this was pretty boring stuff. The idea of an ordinary man going undercover to rescue a relative by taking down bad guys has been done before, over and over again, by the likes of Steven Segal and Jean Claude Van Damme. Granted, this probably had a little more budget than the kind of rubbish those two usually churn out, but sadly it had little or no warmth and left me feeling dissatisfied with the predictable Hollywood ending.

You’ll like this if you liked : Dead Man Down

Astro Boy (2009) 8/10

Starring : Freddie Highmore, Kristen Bell, Nathan Lane, Eugene Levy, Matt Lucas, Bill Nighy, Donald Sutherland, Charlize Theron, Nicolas Cage
Director : David Bowers
Running Time : 94 mins

When his son is killed in a robot related accident, Dr Tenma (Cage) designs a robot replica, giving him the name Toby (Highmore) and making an attempt to replace his deceased son, but when his robotic powers get in the way of him behaving just like Toby, the robot leaves on a journey of self-discovery, facing danger at every turn.

Children and adults alike will enjoy this animated spectacular, with some good storytelling and some interesting plot twists. Killing off what appears to be the main characters in the first half hour of the movie seems a little extreme, but he lives on as Astro Boy and what develops is a two-fold story of accepting the death of a child and coping with abandonment by your parents.

You’ll like this if you liked : Robots

Bullet (2014) 4/10

Starring : Danny Trejo, Jonathan Banks, Julia Dietze
Director : Nick Lyon
Running Time : 88 mins

Frank Marasco (Trejo) is an unconventional cop who arrests the head of a notorious gang of crooks and has him sentenced for execution. In an act of revenge, the sons of the crook kidnap Frank’s grandson and blackmail him into recanting his testimony so that the crook can walk free, but Frank won’t take the threats lying down.

The acting is so bad in this – there’s almost a pause between each line as if the actors have missed their cue. And what a bunch of arseholes those women in the playground were – expecting Trejo to go and help some girl being attacked and then they don’t even keep an eye on his grandson! The directing is over the top at times, and at other times it is just plain lazy, as if the director didn’t want to shoot some scenes but had to in order to make the story work. Fans of Trejo may enjoy this, but the majority will think he should stick to comic action movies like Machete where we aren’t expected to take him seriously.

You’ll like this if you liked : The Art Of War II : Betrayal

Shelter (2010) 7/10

Starring : Julianne Moore, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Jeffrey DeMunn, Frances Conroy
Director : Mans Marlind & Bjorn Stein
Running Time : 108 mins

Forensic psychiatrist Cara Harding (Moore) is brought in to examine a man named Adam (Rhys Meyers), a man who suffers from multiple personality disorder that is both mental and physical. As she delves into the personalities that he embodies, she soon discovers that they are the personalities of murder victims and that she and her family might be next on his list of personalities…

This starts off as what would appear to be a pretty unusual psychological thriller but soon spins itself into a weird horror flick. Nothing truly horrific happens, but the plot with the strange entity that steals people’s souls definitely spells horror plot to me. Thriller fans will enjoy this, but if you want an actual horror with monsters and burtal killings then this probably won’t quench your thirst.

You’ll like this if you liked : Sinister

Grown Ups 2 (2013) 5/10

Starring : Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Chris Rock, David Spade, Salma Hayek, Maya Rudolph, Maria Bello
Director : Dennis Dugan
Running Time : 102 mins

Lenny Feder (Sandler) decides that he wants his family to move to the town he grew up in so they can enjoy the childhood experiences he enjoyed when he was younger, but his plans seem to blow up in his face when he is faced by the bad parts of his past, as well as a bunch of spring breakers who want the townies out of their way.

If you really enjoyed the original movie, then this sequel may make you chuckle in parts. Sadly, the humour feels far too forced and a lot of it just isn’t particularly funny, and as for plot, well, there doesn’t really appear to be one. Sandler and friends just seem to be doing this movie for their own enjoyment, and to hell with what their audience thinks of the end result, which feels like a mish-mash of jokes held together by having the same characters, but here and there you might find the odd moment that may garner a laugh or two.

You’ll like this if you liked : That's My Boy

Batman : Year One (2011) 8/10

Starring : Bryan Cranston, Ben McKenzie, Eliza Dushku, Jon Polito, Alex Rocco, Katee Sackhoff
Director : Sam Liu & Lauren Montgomery
Running Time : 65 mins

Bruce Wayne (McKenzie) returns to Gotham City after years away to find the city over run by crime and corruption. At the same time police officer James Gordon (Cranston) transfers to Gotham from Chicago to find much the same thing. While Gordon tries to fight the corruption from within the police force, with many of his fellow officers angry at his actions, Wayne dons the cowl of the Batman and becomes a vigilante fighting crime in his own way.

I loved the animation in this Batman movie – clearly having a Japanese influence – and the origin story is perfectly presented and will please any die-hard Batman fans. The darkness is there, which is good, and Batman is nicely psychopathic, which is always a bonus. It is a little cheesy and convoluted in parts, but that’s what you’d expect from a comic book adaptation where the characters costumes haven’t been honed yet.

You’ll like this if you liked : Batman : Under The Red Hood

A Long Way Down (2014) 7/10

Starring : Pierce Brosnan, Toni Collette, Imogen Poots, Aaron Paul
Director : Pascal Chaumeil
Running Time : 96 mins

On New Year’s Eve, four strangers – Martin (Brosnan), Maureen (Collette), Jess (Poots) and JJ (Paul) - meet on the roof of a popular suicide spot, each having their own reasons for taking their own lives. They soon develop a pact not to try and kill themselves again before Valentine’s Day, and start trying to help each other through their painful experiences.

Like many of Nick Hornby’s books, this doesn’t work as well as a film, but it is still a decent watch. The actors work well in their respective roles, and the humour is nicely subdued where it could have easily gone way over the top. Fans of Hornby might find this a little light, what with previous movies such as High Fidelity and fever Pitch being much more energetic, but if you liked About A Boy you’ll probably like this too.

You’ll like this if you liked : About A Boy

Two Little Boys (2012) 7/10

Starring : Bret McKenzie, Hamish Blake, Maaka Pohatu, Filip Berg
Director : Robert Sarkies
Running Time : 102 mins

When Nige (McKenzie) accidentally kills a backpacker on a late night drive, he turns to his childhood friend Deano (Blake) to help dispose of the body. It isn’t long before his one-time best friend starts causing more trouble for Nige, culminating in him wanting to murder Nige’s new best friend Gav (Pohatu).

This could have been so much fun if the methods of getting rid of the body had have been more imaginative. The failed bromance between McKenzie and Blake is what does manage to keep this watchable, and the progressive insanity of Blake keeps you guessing as to what madcap idea he will come up with next. Fans of Flight Of The Conchords will be please to see that McKenzie has more than one string to his bow as his character here is very different, and Blake manages to remain both funny and sinister throughout the movie.

You’ll like this if you liked : Sightseers

We're The Millers (2013) 8/10

Starring : Jennifer Aniston, Jason Sudeikis, Emma Roberts, Nick Offerman, Kathryn Hahn, Will Poulter, Ed Helms
Director : Rawson Marshall Thurber
Running Time : 119 mins

When minor drug dealer David Clark (Sudeikis) gets his stash stolen, his supplier Brad Gurdlinger (Helms) forces him to pick up a shipment from Mexico and deliver it to him. In order to avoid suspicion, David ask stripper Rose (Aniston) to pose as his wife and, along with homeless girl Casey (Roberts) and his teenage neighbour Kenny (Poulter) pretending to be their kids, they hire an RV and head across the border. But it isn’t long before the real owner of the drug shipment finds out and tries to kill them.

This was pretty funny, though a little long, with some good performances and nice cameos throughout. Sudeikis and Aniston make a great on screen partnership, and it’s nice to see Sudeikis in a lead role. Poulter is great as the loser neighbour kid and comes across as a young Lee Evans, and Roberts is okay, though not outstanding. Fans of movies like Due Date or The Hangover will love this not-quite gross-out comedy, so enjoy.

You’ll like this if you liked : The Joneses

Moulin Rouge! (2001) 6/10

Starring : Ewan McGregor, Nicole Kidman, John Leguizamo, Jim Broadbent, Richard Roxburgh
Director : Baz Luhrmann
Running Time : 128 mins

It’s 1899, and a young English writer named Christian (McGregor) travels to Paris, France to join the Bohemian revolution of the time. There he discovers a night club called the Moulin Rouge and falls for one of the star dancers, Satine (Kidman), who mistakes him for an investor. Their love affair, however, meets with challenges as the real investor, The Duke (Roxburgh), loves her too and wants to keep them apart by any means possible.

This musical drama takes a lot from Shakespeare, with its play within a play mirroring what is happening in real life, and its use of modern music is interesting, but it’s a little over long and at times quite boring. Musical fans might find this fun, but other movie goers will struggle at times to maintain interest in this average movie.

You’ll like this if you liked : Mamma Mia!

Bad Neighbours (2014) 7/10

Starring : Seth Rogen, Rose Byrne, Zac Efron, Dave Franco, Carla Gallo
Director : Nicholas Stoller
Running Time : 97 mins

Suburbanites Mac Radner (Rogen) and his wife Kelly (Byrne) have a new born baby and have just settled in to a new peaceful neighbourhood, but when a college fraternity move in next door they discover that their quiet life is being disturbed nightly and when the police won’t do anything about it they soon find that they have entered a battle of wills with the college kids to see who will survive the crazy plots to get rid of the other neighbour.

This comedy has its moments, and feels at times like a modern day Animal House, but the fact that the couple complaining about the childish behaviour of their neighbours are just as childish can at times cause them to lose any sympathy I might have had for them. Fans of Rogen and Byrne’s other comedies will enjoy this, and many might be surprised that Efron is turning into something of a comedy star himself.

You’ll like this if you liked : Role Models

Nothing But The Truth (2008) 7/10

Starring : Kate Beckinsale, Matt Dillon, Angela Bassett, Alan Alda, Vera Farmiga
Director : Rod Lurie
Running Time : 107 mins

Political reporter Rachel Armstrong (Beckinsale) sees an opportunity to further her career and possibly win a Pulitzer by writing a story claiming that the President ignored vital information from an undercover CIA agent, but when she names the agent in the report she is arrested for contempt for not naming her source, and finds her civil rights under threat.

This courtroom drama really shows how ridiculous the American legal system can be. So, there’s one rule that says you can plead the Fifth Amendment so as not to incriminate yourself, but then there’s another rule that says you can claim that by pleading the Fifth you are committing treason? How does that work? As the movie progresses, Beckinsale’s character finds her life going down the toilet, and although this could have been done in a less obvious way it is still an interesting view of how one person can stand against their government on a principle. Plus the twist in the tale, though predictable, is still affective and touching.

You’ll like this if you liked : Fair Game

Straight A's (2013) 6/10

Starring : Ryan Phillippe, Anna Paquin, Luke Wilson, Riley Thomas Stewart, Ursula Parker
Director : James Cox
Running Time : 89 mins

Recovering alcohol and drug addict Scott (Phillippe) returns to his home town after ten years in and out of rehab after being prompted by the ghost of his dead mother to return to his family and make amends with his brother William (Wilson), who married his childhood sweetheart Katherine (Paquin) after Scott left her at the altar. He is met with little tolerance from his brother and sister-in-law, but makes an unlikely friend in his nephew Charles (Stewart).

This drama is pretty basic, and doesn’t really go anywhere for over an hour, but then we are faced with the true reasons behind Scott’s visit and this becomes something of a tearjerker. His influence in visiting seems to have been to bring the rest of his family closer together which, I guess, worked reasonably well. This isn’t very deep, and doesn’t explore the characters as much as it could have, and some more humour would have been nice, but it’s watchable.

You’ll like this if you liked : Life As We Know It

Heaven (2002) 7/10

Starring : Cate Blanchett, Giovanni Ribisi, Remo Girone
Director : Tom Tykwer
Running Time : 98 mins

Following the death of her husband from an accidental drug overdose, Philippa Paccard (Blanchett) decides to take vengeance against one of Italy’s biggest drug dealers by planting a bomb in his office. When the attempt on his life fails, instead killing an innocent man, his two daughters and a maid, she finds herself being charged as a member of a terrorist organization. Police translator Filippo (Ribisi) decides to help her escape when he looks into her background and discovers she is not a terrorist, and he finds himself falling for her.

Although slow paced, this is an interesting movie that manages to keep the viewer’s interest in what will happen to the main two characters. The only thing that is fast paced about this movie is the relationship of Philippa and Filippo, who quickly fall for each other, and Filippo risks his career for Philippa without even knowing that much about her. This is a pleasant enough romantic drama that clearly delivers what it sets out to accomplish.

You’ll like this if you liked : The Next Three Days