Breaking Dawn Part 2 (2012) 5/10

Starring : Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner
Director : Bill Condon
Running Time : 116 mins

Bella Swan (Stewart) has been turned into a vampire, and thankfully she has shown no signs of suffering from the feeding frenzy that most new-born vampire suffer from. But, with the birth of her half-human half-vampire child, fathered by Edward Cullen (Pattinson), the vampire hordes of the Volturri are on the warpath, believing that the child was conceived by two vampires and thus an abomination.

This is possible the most terrible instalment of the series ever, and thankfully it’s the last. Even die-hard fans of the series should be able to see through how nonsensical and poorly put together this movie is. Granted, the book was pretty bad too, and sadly the screen writers have stuck pretty loyally to the book which is full of convenient twists and annoying resolutions that really make this movie something of an abomination.

You’ll like this if you liked : Eclipse

Arthur 3 : The War Of The Two Worlds (2010) 7/10

Starring : Freddie Highmore, Selena Gomez, Mia Farrow, Jimmy Fallon, Lou Reed, Iggy Pop
Director : Luc Besson
Running Time : 102 mins

Malthazard (Reed) has managed to increase himself to seven feet tall, while Arthur (Highmore) is still trapped in his Minimoy form. With the help of Selenia (Gomez) and Betameche (Fallon), Arthur comes up with a dangerous plan to get them back into their house and find an elixir that will return him to his normal size, but Malthazard’s son Darkos (Pop) is hot on their tails.

This was much more fun than the second instalment of the trilogy and filled with much more action. There is plenty of comedy which seemed to be lacking in the second movie, and even the special effects look better. Fans of the series will be pleased with the conclusion, and fans of Iggy Pop and Lou Reed will enjoy their performances in this.

You’ll like this if you liked : Flushed Away

Beyond A Reasonable Doubt (2009) 6/10

Starring : Jesse Metcalfe, Amber Tamblyn, Michael Douglas, Joel David Moore, Orlando Jones
Director : Peter Hyams
Running Time : 106 mins

Journalist C J Nicholas (Metcalfe) suspects that hot-shot lawyer Mark Hunter (Douglas) may be tampering with evidence in order to ensure his suspects get convicted, so he comes up with a plan to frame himself for a random murder to see if his DNA is planted at the scene. When it is he thinks he’s won, until his evidence disappears and it becomes a case of his word against that of a major law firm.

This movie was okay, but the ridiculous ideas that Metcalfe’s character comes up with to entrap Douglas are a little hard to swallow. The fact that he manages to prove Douglas’s dodgy ways doesn’t really matter, and the stupid twist at the end just makes Metcalfe’s plan all the more unbelievable.

You’ll like this if you liked : Deception

The Skulls (2000) 7/10

Starring : Joshua Jackson, Paul Walker, Hill Harper, Leslie Bibb, Christopher McDonald, Steve Harris, William Petersen, Craig T Nelson
Director : Rob Cohen
Running Time : 102 mins

In hopes of getting accepted to Harvard to study law, college senior Luke McNamara (Jackson) joins a secret fraternity known as The Skulls. Things start off appealing enough, with the idea of great wealth and preferential treatment appealing to him greatly, but when his best friend Will Beckford (Harper) is found dead he starts to wonder who is behind his death and how they are managing to get away with it.

This isn’t the cleverest thriller I’ve ever seen, and when one of your villains is Paul Walker you shouldn’t expect Shakespeare, but this is a likeable enough teen thriller that, although it isn’t filled with any real surprises, is definitely watchable if you’re happy to just switch off and try to enjoy it.

You’ll like this if you liked : Gossip

Welcome To The Punch (2013) 7/10

Starring : James McAvoy, Mark Strong, Andrea Riseborough, David Morrissey, Peter Mullan
Director : Eran Creevy
Running Time : 99 mins

When he hears that his son has been injured during a robbery gone wrong, Jacob Sternwood (Strong) returns to London from his hideout in Iceland to ensure his sons safety and to make sure that his son doesn’t go to jail for the crime, but detective Max Lewinsky (McAvoy), who has been after Sternwood since his disappearance, takes the opportunity to track him down.

This is one of those rare modern crime capers that doesn’t overuse the C word by putting it in every other sentence. The storyline is a little confused, but the performances are solid enough. I didn’t like the ending which seemed to come out of nowhere and, although much of the story is resolved, it still felt a little open-ended.

You’ll like this if you liked : Man On A Ledge

Species : The Awakening (2007) 5/10

Starring : Ben Cross, Hellena Matteson, Dominic Keating, Marlene Farvela
Director : Nick Lyon
Running Time : 94 mins

Dr Tom Hollander (Cross) tries to reverse the effects of the alien DNA he used to create his daughter Miranda (Matteson), but his experiments end up pushing her alien side to the surface and she sets out to find the perfect mate, killing anyone in her path she deems unworthy.

Easily the worst of the series, Natasha Henstridge is nowhere in sight in this weak sequel that has very little to do with the originals. The alien aspect is almost non-existent, what with the girl being a human and all, and fans of the series will most likely be very disappointed by this.

You’ll like this if you liked : Alone In The Dark

Parental Guidance (2012) 7/10

Starring : Billy Crystal, Bette Midler, Marisa Tomei, Tom Everett Scott
Director : Andy Fickman
Running Time : 105 mins

Artie (Crystal) and Diane Decker (Midler) are old school parents, so when their daughter Alice (Tomei) and her inventor husband Phil (Scott) ask them to look after their three grandkids they find themselves thrown into a weird modern world of never saying no to your kids and allowing them to run free and realise consequences for themselves. Clearly it looks like Artie and Diane can’t deal with this, but they soon realise that sometimes you have to compromise.

I wasn’t expecting to like this, and to be honest the kids really irritated me (that ginger kid is the creepiest kid EVER!), but I have to say I did enjoy this movie. Granted, it was pretty predictable, and there are no prizes for originality, but if you want a solid harmless family movie then you won’t go far wrong with this.

You’ll like this if you liked : Little Fockers

Breakaway (2011) 7/10

Starring : Vinay Virmani, Russell Peters, Anupam Kher, Camilla Belle, Rob Lowe
Director : Robert Lieberman
Running Time : 101 mins

Sikh hockey fan Rajvinder Singh (Virmani) has been brought up in Canada and loves the national sport, but his father Darvesh (Kher) disapproves of his seeming disrespect for their religion, wanting him to carry on in the family business and to abide by Sikh tradition. So when Raj decides to form the first ever all-Sikh hockey team, he is met with anger from his father and ridicule from his contemporaries.

Anyone that loves a true underdog story will enjoy this light hearted romantic comedy. The story may be one we have heard before in one form or another, but this new twist on an old tale manages to show the story from all angles. With a little romantic tension thrown in for good measure, you’d be hard pressed to find someone who didn’t at least raise a smile during this romp.

You’ll like this if you liked : Cool Runnings

Stolen (2012) 7/10

Starring : Nicolas Cage, Malin Akerman, Josh Lucas, Danny Huston, Sami Gayle
Director : David Guggenheim
Running Time : 96 mins

When Will Montgomery (Cage) is released from prison following a theft where none of the money was recovered, the police suspect he knows where the money is hidden due to his bizarre behaviour. The truth is his ex-partner Vincent (Lucas), presumed dead, has crawled out of the woodwork and kidnapped Montgomery’s daughter Alison (Gayle) and is holding her to ransom for the money.

This is a pretty standard thriller that mimics many existing caper movies and does little to improve on them, but still manages to remain entertaining. Lucas is pretty good as the villain of the piece, but Cage really feels like his heart isn’t in it. Cage does spoil this a bit, but if you think National Treasure meets Die Hard With A Vengeance, you’ve got a pretty good idea of what to expect.

You’ll like this if you liked : Die Hard With A Vengeance

Bereavement (2010) 6/10

Starring : Michael Biehn, John Savage, Brett Rickaby, Alexandra Daddario, Spencer List
Director : Stevan Mena
Running Time : 108 mins

Six year old Martin Bristol (List) is kidnapped by crazed killer Graham Sutter (Rickaby) and, over the next five years, he is forced to watch as Sutter brings a continuous flow of young female victims to kill in front of him, but Sutter may have met his match when he makes the mistake of kidnapping Allison (Daddario), who intends to rescue the boy.

There are no surprises and nothing really special about this slasher film. The idea of a killer holding someone hostage just to watch his killings is nice, but I’m sure it has been done before, and the acting in this movie was pretty limited. Probably the best thing I can say about this movie is that Daddario’s breasts look great, and boy was that house cold, but aside from that I’d suggest not bothering.

You’ll like this if you liked : Captivity

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo (2011) 8/10

Starring : Daniel Craig, Rooney Mara, Christopher Plummer, Stellan Skarsgard
Director : David Fincher
Running Time : 159 mins

Following his very public fall from grace, journalist Mikael Blomkvist (Craig) is employed by business magnate Henrik Vanger (Plummer) who seeks his help in finding out who killed his niece forty years earlier. As Blomkvist starts to worry that the information he has discovered might need double checking due to his previous indiscretions, he employees the aid of emo computer hacker Lisbeth Salander (Mara).

Although I personally preferred the original movie, in many ways this version makes a lot more sense. Perhaps it’s because things needed to be spelled out more for American audiences, but the flow of information was much clearer. The biggest issue I had with this movie was Rooney Mara’s hair, which changed so frequently and in such impossible ways (going from short to long between scenes without the use of a wig?) that it became something of a distraction.

You’ll like this if you liked : Zodiac

Wonder Woman (2009) 8/10

Starring : Keri Russell, Nathan Fillion, Alfred Molina, Rosario Dawson
Director : Lauren Montgomery
Running Time : 74 mins

Air Force pilot Steve Trevor (Fillion) crash lands on a remote island inhabited by the fabled Amazons. His presence allows the distraction needed for the escape of the Greek god of war, Ares (Molina), who has been held captive by the Amazons for centuries, and when his escape is discovered, Princess Diana (Russell) offers to track him down and capture him – with the help of Steve Trevor.

Nathan Fillion’s character lends some much needed comic relief to what could easily have been a very downbeat tale. Thankfully the writers have peppered this with a very witty script, something that is so often missing in DC’s animated movies, and this makes this one of the better efforts in their series of straight-to-video films.

You’ll like this if you liked : Justice League : The New Frontier

Sightseers (2012) 8/10

Starring : Alice Lowe, Steve Oram, Eileen Davies
Director : Ben Wheatley
Running Time : 89 mins

Tina (Lowe) can’t wait to go on a caravanning holiday with her boyfriend Chris (Oram), though her mother Carol (Davies) doesn’t like him. Nevertheless the two set off on a seemingly dull journey around the North of England to visit various museums, until events take a surprising turn for the worse when Chris accidentally backs the caravan over a fellow traveller, and then events quickly spiral out of control for the pair.

This is a very clever comic thriller that manages to allow the killing spree of the two main characters to really sneak up on you. Fans of Edgar Wright movies will enjoy this light hearted look at how serial killers can easily be created simply because some people just have no respect. Some of the killings do start to feel unnecessary, but that just shows how the mind set of Chris and Tina starts to change as the movie progresses.

You’ll like this if you liked : Seven Psychopaths

Catch .44 (2011) 5/10

Starring : Forest Whitaker, Bruce Willis, Malin Akerman, Nikki Reed, Deborah Ann Woll, Shea Whigham, Brad Dourif
Director : Aaron Harvey
Running Time : 94 mins

Small time crooks Tes (Akerman), Kara (Reed) and Dawn (Woll) are asked by drug boss Mel (Willis) to intercept a delivery of drugs from a rival dealer. They are expected to wait at a remote diner which the driver is expected to stop at, but things go wrong when the driver doesn’t turn up and the girls get antsy and pull their guns on the staff and customers in the hope of forcing them to tell them who the driver is.

This really felt like Aaron Harvey had watched too many Tarantino movies and desperately wanted to imitate him but failed miserably. The use of back-and-forth scenes was spoilt by the over use of repetition in them, and I actually started to get bored of the girls getting shot in the exact same way over and over again. Fans of confusing thrillers might like this, but people with half a brain will be disappointed that there wasn’t more to the story.

You’ll like this if you liked : Bitch Slap

Tremors 3 : Back To Perfection (2001) 6/10

Starring : Michael Gross, Shawn Christian, Susan Chuang
Director : Brent Maddock
Running Time : 99 mins

Burt Gummer (Gross) returns from his travels abroad - where he has been battling the worm-like menace of the Graboids – to his home town of Perfection, Nevada, only to discover that the local pests that recently evolved from Graboids to Shriekers have now taken on a third evolutionary strain that could be deadlier than any he’s seen before.

Although the focus of this movie is much better than in the second instalment, the transformation of the Graboids is completely ridiculous and not as – I hate to say it – realistic as in the first sequel. Coupled with the straight-to-video special effects and some less than impressive acting, I’d say that only true fans of the franchise will enjoy this.

You’ll like this if you liked : Eight Legged Freaks

Conviction (2010) 8/10

Starring : Hilary Swank, Sam Rockwell, Minnie Driver, Juliette Lewis, Melissa Leo
Director : Tony Goldwyn
Running Time : 107 mins

Betty Anne Watters (Swank) is a single mother who, when her brother Kenny (Rockwell) is wrongfully convicted of murder, spends twenty years putting herself through law school so that she can have her brother re-tried, using every trick in the book to find new evidence that might clear his name.

This is a well performed movie that, although it doesn’t have much substance to go on, truly manages to remain engrossing and gripping throughout its duration. Fans of Swank and Rockwell will be impressed by their star turns in this surprisingly good movie, and it’s good to see Swank doing proper dramatic roles again.

You’ll like this if you liked : The Next Three Days

Gangster Squad (2013) 8/10

Starring : Josh Brolin, Ryan Gosling, Sean Penn, Nick Nolte, Emma Stone, Anthony Mackie, Giovanni Ribisi, Robert Patrick, Michael Pena, Mirielle Enos
Director : Ruben Fleischer
Running Time : 113 mins

It’s 1949, and with the city of Los Angeles firmly under the control of mob boss Mickey Cohen (Penn), Sergeant John O’Mara (Brolin) decides to form a group of cops who will work outside the law to try and take down the crime kingpin and finally return their city back to the people, but the best laid plans of all involved don’t always go as smoothly as they hoped.

This is a fun-filled, action packed movie that, in spite of its comical title, is to be taken too seriously. It manages to pack itself full of everything you could want from a gangster flick, from romance to bromance, from gun play to fist fights, this basically has everything you could want in a crime caper, aside from an element of realism about how Cohen manages to get away with everything but then gets arrested for what amounts to having a fight with a cop (granted there are some dead bodies milling around the place, but he managed to get away with those sort of shenanigans previously).

You’ll like this if you liked : L A Confidential

The Gundown (2011) 5/10

Starring : Peter Coyote, William Shockley, Andrew W Walker, Sheree J Wilson
Director : Dustin Rikert
Running Time : 97 mins

Gun for hire Cole Brandt (Walker) finds himself in the lawless town of Dead River where he is hired to protect a bar called The Majestic Saloon, but when Brandt falls for a local prostitute the job he’s been charged with takes a much more personal turn.

This was possibly the most half-hearted attempt at making a Western I have ever seen. This not only felt like a TV movie, but the poor casting – including a woman whose face looked like it was entirely made of plastic – and the shaky plot made this nothing more than a let down, especially considering how good recent Western’s have been.

You’ll like this if you liked : Really Bad Westerns